I've posted a lot on this blog about my (seemingly never ending) struggle to get back into music after many diversions, distractions, and dead ends. This past summer, I asked my wife to get me something musical for my birthday.
She got me a beginner's level flute and violin, but she didn't realize the situation would totally spiral out of control.
The flute
For those that don't know, I played flute from 4th grade all the way through high school. I didn't play in college, due mostly to the fact that I was a double major and adding concert band to the mix would have been academic suicide. (And have I mentioned that I loathe marching band? Because I do.)
I put the new (GREEN!) flute together and played through some intermediate level exersizes with varying success. I moved on to a short little etude in the key of F, and immediately noticed that something was wrong: my Fs were virtually nonexistent.
At first I thought it might be that I was mis-remembering the correct fingering. I consulted a fingering chart, confirmed that I was doing it correctly, and then puzzled over what the problem was. Some lovely flautists on Facebook suggested tightening the spring, which I did with no success.
The next course of action was to contact the sellers (on eBay). Not only did they take at least a week to respond every time we contacted them, it became immediately clear that they are not musicians, just people who flog things on eBay. I sent them a video of the problem and they replied that it was fine (?), much to my frustration. After three months of back and forth with them, I gave up. The flute sits in its case on the table, unused and unplayed until I can find the time/money to have it repaired at a shop in London.
The violin
It arrived in a lovely case, with a cute little pot of rosin. I played upright bass for awhile in high school so while string instruments as a whole are not foreign objects, I still spent 20 minutes trying to figure out the chin rest (once it arrived 6 weeks after I ordered it). Chin rest in place, a new YouTube lesson for beginner fiddle players queued up, I set to try and tune the violin.
Every time I tried to turn the tuning peg, it wouldn't hold. It would just go back to its original position when I released it. Frustrated, I took to Google to figure out the problem: most experienced violinists suggested that the strings may be wound incorrectly, while some said that plastic pegs (like the ones on my cheap violin) might be responsible.
I picked up the violin to examine it again, and the bridge fell down.
Again, we contacted the sellers. Again, we were unsuccessful. The violin sits in its case, never played. It's such a poorly made instrument that I'm hesitant to even try taking it in to get fixed for fear they would laugh me out of the store.
The conclusion
Given my struggles in 2016 to get back into music with new skills, learning more about DAWs and digital music composition, this doesn't feel like a coincidence that both instruments are unplayable.
It's obviously some kind of omen that I should totally give up on music, burn the violin as kindling, and melt the flute down to make ironic bracelet charms to sell on Etsy.
Okay, maybe that't a tiny bit of hyperbole - my wife thinks I'm being overdramatic. Maybe she's right, and maybe these unfortunate situations are just another piece of the 2016 dumpster fire puzzle.
Here's to next year, eh?
(If anyone has any ideas or advice, please leave a comment or hit me up on Twitter @AngelinaPanozzo, I am genuinely keen to get these fixed and functional!)
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