Top 10 Most Annoying Instruments

Who will it be? Who will win the prize? (There's no prize.)

I base this on a random, completely unscientific survey of musicians that I know and happen to talk to on a semi-regular basis. All hate can be directed to the comments.

10. The Saxophone. 

Known for its uses in wind ensemble and not in traditional orchestras, the saxophone is a brassy beast with a seriously weird sine wave. 

But how could we survive without this? ("He doesn't like George Michael! BOOOO!")

9. The Jaw Harp. 

I tried to play this instrument once, and it didn't sound pretty, at all. I managed to lacerate my cheek because I am the clumsiest person alive. 

But this is pretty cool?

8. The Glockenspiel. 

What?? My anonymous surveyors have really let me down with this one. Glockenspiels are incredibly tinny sounding and you can't hear them over any other instrument, but they CAN play nice music! 

Exhibit A! 

7. The Vuvuzela. 

As fas as I'm aware, these only show up with overzealous fans at sporting events. 

It turns out, I was wrong. Listen to this auditory masterpiece. (The vuvuzelas come in at 0:45)

6. The Piccolo.

Ignoring my...affection, for this instrument based on 4 years of mandatory marching band, the piccolo is rarely in tune. "How do you tune two piccolos? You shoot one." 

But when (rarely) played well, the piccolo is icing on a Vivaldi cake. 

5. The Kazoo. 

I don't know where my survey takers are hanging out that they hear many kazoos, maybe at children's birthday parties? Or the music shop I used to work in on a Saturday when 15 toddlers get into the box of kazoos?

Kazoos are practical, mult-genre instruments, proved by this arrangement of "Enter Sandman."

4. Jingle Bells.

This I agree with. Unless you are jamming to Leroy Anderson's arrangement of "Sleigh Ride," you should probably leave those bells alone. If you even look at them funny, they make an immense amount of noise, and thanks to Mr. Anderson, we can't hear sleigh bells without thinking about reindeer and candy canes. 

But here's Sleigh Bells in "End of the Line!" 

Just kidding, there's no bells in that. Proving my point that sleigh bells are only for Sleigh Rides.  

3. The Bagpipes. 

Okay, anonymous people I surveyed, you obviously don't have the same love of Celtic music that I do. Aside from the rich cultural history, the bagpipes can admittedly sound a bit grating, especially if your neighbor is practicing at midnight.

But bagpipes can rock the house - like playing AC/DC's "Thunderstruck." 

2. The Melodion. 

This instrument is one of the most bizarre sounding creations that still manages to maintain tonality. It's like a harmonica...on steroids. 

But it can do this! Behold, Jacob Venndt! Listen to those grooving rhythms!

1. The Recorder. 

Despised worldwide due to early education music classes and plastic instruments with a tone halfway between a flute and a whistle that will make your ears bleed, the recorder far surpassed any other instrument in the survey.

May I present for evidence to the contrary, the Flanders Recorder Quartet. Whoa.

And there you have it - the world's 10 most annoying instruments. Enjoy.